A Lost
Art?
By Susan Klein
“A friend loves at
all times…”
Proverbs
17:17a (NIV)
”I’m
friends with her on Facebook.” Though common to hear in today’s culture, I recently
paused to ponder this all-too-familiar response to my inquiry. How often is
someone we only know through social media considered to be a “friend”? If you
were to view my Facebook page, you’d see that I have 270 “friends.” That couldn’t
be farther from the truth! I’ve never even met some of those people. Has social
networking (with over 200 sites to choose from…not counting dating sites)
caused some to redefine what a true friend is, and what it means to “practice
friendship”?
Gone
are the days when women friends gathered around a table to stitch a quilt
together for the bride-to-be as they spent much-valued time catching up on each
other’s lives. It’s no longer common practice to chat with our neighbors as we
hang clothes on the line or run down the street after dinner to check on a friend.
No doubt, we live in different times.
Friendship
is truly an art and, like any great masterpiece, must be diligently worked at. Though
times and trends may change, a true friend is still one who encourages, who
sharpens, and who actively loves another without conditions. A really good
friend knows how to set healthy boundaries, yet is not afraid to confront and hold
accountable, always looking to the friend’s best interest. These actions cannot
be accomplished by the stroke of a key or the swipe of a screen. Leaving a
short birthday wish on a social network site might be fine for someone who is
merely an acquaintance, but should it replace a card or phone call to someone
we hold dear? Should a “how are you?” text message replace an earnest phone
call to let someone know we care about them?
Social
media definitely has its place. Caring Bridge and Linked In are two wonderful
vehicles for sharing information with others. Even Facebook allows me to gather
information and see pictures of family and friends that live far away. Many
blessings can be gleaned through these technological means, but nothing can
replace sharing a cup of coffee and a good long chat with a precious friend, or
a listening ear and a word of advice when we are facing a tough decision. And,
who would turn down a hug and an encouraging word from someone on a really bad
day?
Let’s
keep the art of practicing friendship the beautiful masterpiece that it was
intended to be!
GOING
DEEPER:
1.
Do you have any works of art that have been neglected for awhile?
2.
How might you actively sharpen or encourage one of your friends?
FURTHER
READING:
Susan is married to
Mark, and has two adult children. She enjoys teaching Bible studies, writing,
and tutoring with the Literacy Council. She is a member of the Peace Team at
Oakwood.
