Wrestling With God
By Brita Crouse
"Yes, [Jacob] wrestled with the angel and won. He wept and pleaded for a blessing from him. There at Bethel he met God face to face, and God spoke to him - - the LORD God Almighty, the LORD is His name!"
Hosea 12:4,5 (NLT)
It is amazing how much happens in a year. For me, a specific year recently was full of joy and struggle and changes. Here is what I wrote:
Now I find myself preparing to make another big transition. Of course, there is excitement in this because it means new people, places and experiences. But, it also means that many doors, which opened up a year ago, are now beginning to close.
Over the past year, I've had opportunities to teach, lead, minister, learn, grow, witness and deepen relationships through work, volunteer positions and interactions with loved ones. Now that I am approaching this new stage of life - - one that I have anticipated and praying about for years - - I find myself on a roller coaster of emotion.
Lately, I have felt like I'm in a wrestling match with God. I have so much to look forward to, but it's hard for me to see past my disappointment in giving up things I have come to love doing. God has led me to and through some amazing places this past year, so I keep reminding myself that I will embrace where He leads me in the future.
In Genesis 32, we read about Jacob, who is feeling the pressure of an impending meeting with his estranged brother. A "Man" sees Jacob, who is alone, and wrestles him. Jacob is at a point in his life where he needs to submit to God. He has a lot riding on this meeting with his brother Esau but he needs to trust God with it. That is what the Man is there to help him realize. Jacob didn't wrestle with God, God initiated and wrestled with him to bring him to a point of true surrender. (1)
Much like Jacob, I am also learning this lesson of submission and trust. God has blessed me immensely this past year and now He is calling me to move on to something else. Instead of resisting His great plan for me, I am learning to embrace it.
God's plan for our lives is so much greater than we could ever hope or imagine. Our response? Submit to and trust in Him.
GOING DEEPER:
How can God be shining through your weakness today?
Listen to "You Make Everything Beautiful" by Rebecca St. James (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gRyDhDXMaog).
FURTHER READING:
(1) Perkins, Daniel. "The Cost of Wrestling with God." Relevant Magazine. Web. 25 June 2014. Read it here: http://www.relevantmagazine.com/god/practical-faith/cost-wrestling-god
Brita recently graduated with her Master's in Educational Psychology from the University of Minnesota-Twin Cities. She has called Oakwood her home church for the past eighteen years.
