Free
By
Lexi Ellis
“With
the arrival of Jesus, the Messiah, that fateful dilemma is resolved. Those who
enter into Christ’s being-here-for-us no longer have to live under a
continuous, low-lying black cloud. A new power is in operation. The Spirit of
life in Christ, like a strong wind, has magnificently cleared the air, freeing
you from a fated lifetime of brutal tyranny at the hands of sin and
death.”
Romans 8:1-2 (The Message paraphrase)
Romans 8:1-2 (The Message paraphrase)
Four years later, I can
still distinctively remember it…feeling hopeless and just staring at my
laptop’s blank screen. Writing a paper wasn’t usually difficult. For a class, I
had to analyze a societal message and its effects in my life. Originally, I had
a researched, beautiful outline in which I wrote of my struggles with having a
healthy relationship with food. It was a comfortable vulnerability, un-messy.
And yet, my professor wanted me to re-do it. After lots of tears, I was convicted
I needed to address issues beyond my simplified outline. I had to ask questions
with unknown answers…or ones I might not like.
So after processing and
praying, I approached the blank screen and wrote how my food issues were a
coping mechanism for a simple reality: I struggle with self-hatred. It takes
work to overcome a flood of critical, self-deprecating thoughts. But even after
I learned the tools to help manage this, I felt guilty. For some reason, the
guilt from struggling with self-hatred was worse than acknowledging the “food
stuff.” Here I was with this struggle that seemed so stupid. It was terrifying
to realize that acknowledging it through writing would force me to address it.
Part of the enormous
beauty of the Cross is that Christ conquered guilt and shame. Paul writes that
in Christ “there is no more condemnation.” A synonym is criticism. There
is now no more criticism. What Christ has done for us (and our acceptance of
His gift along with an ongoing relationship with Him) means we are free.
How powerful that He
freed us from the bondage of hell and the bondage of guilt! In
John Bunyan’s classic Pilgrim’s Progress, the character Christian
has been carrying a heavy, horrific burden. When he encounters freedom in
Christ, this immense baggage drops, “loosed from off his shoulders, and fell
from off his back, and began to tumble; and so continued to do…and I saw it no
more.” [1]
While life doesn’t
always get easier, we are free from shame. When life is hectic, it’s important
to be aware the Cross also released us from guilt. I’m thankful that a blank
screen caused me to recognize - - while it was hard to process how gripping
that guilt was on my life - - I serve a bigger God who has freed me.
GOING DEEPER:
1. What guilt/shame do
you struggle with?
2. Take it to the Lord
- - He has conquered guilt.
FURTHER READING:
Romans
8:1-4 (The Message paraphrase)
[1] Bunyan, Pilgrim’s
Progress, chapter 3 (http://www.learnthebible.org/c_p_pilgrims_progress_chapter_3.htm)
Lexi
is married to Andrew and has a puppy named Calvin. She teaches sixth grade at
Silver Lake Intermediate School, serves with Children’s Ministries at Oakwood
and is the Fresh Start coordinator.
