Free
By Lexi Ellis
“With the arrival of Jesus, the
Messiah, that fateful dilemma is resolved. Those who enter into Christ’s
being-here-for-us no longer have to live under a continuous, low-lying black
cloud. A new power is in operation. The Spirit of life in Christ, like a strong
wind, has magnificently cleared the air, freeing you from a fated lifetime of
brutal tyranny at the hands of sin and death.”
Romans 8:1-2 (The Message paraphrase)
Romans 8:1-2 (The Message paraphrase)
Four
years later, I can still distinctively remember it…feeling hopeless and just
staring at my laptop’s blank screen. Writing a paper wasn’t usually difficult. For
a class, I had to analyze a societal message and its effects in my life.
Originally, I had a researched, beautiful outline in which I wrote of my
struggles with having a healthy relationship with food. It was a comfortable
vulnerability, un-messy. And yet, my professor wanted me to re-do it. After
lots of tears, I was convicted I needed to address issues beyond my simplified
outline. I had to ask questions with unknown answers…or ones I might not like.
So
after processing and praying, I approached the blank screen and wrote how my
food issues were a coping mechanism for a simple reality: I struggle with
self-hatred. It takes work to overcome a flood of critical, self-deprecating
thoughts. But even after I learned the tools to help manage this, I felt
guilty. For some reason, the guilt from struggling with self-hatred was worse
than acknowledging the “food stuff.” Here I was with this struggle that seemed
so stupid. It was terrifying to realize that acknowledging it through writing
would force me to address it.
Part
of the enormous beauty of the Cross is that Christ conquered guilt and shame.
Paul writes that in Christ “there is no more condemnation.” A synonym is
criticism. There is now no more criticism. What Christ has done for us
(and our acceptance of His gift along with an ongoing relationship with Him)
means we are free.
How
powerful that He freed us from the bondage of hell and the bondage of
guilt! In John Bunyan’s classic Pilgrim’s Progress, the
character Christian has been carrying a heavy, horrific burden. When he
encounters freedom in Christ, this immense baggage drops, “loosed from off his
shoulders, and fell from off his back, and began to tumble; and so continued to
do…and I saw it no more.” [1]
While
life doesn’t always get easier, we are free from shame. When life is hectic,
it’s important to be aware the Cross also released us from guilt. I’m thankful
that a blank screen caused me to recognize - - while it was hard to process how
gripping that guilt was on my life - - I serve a bigger God who has freed
me.
GOING
DEEPER:
1.
What guilt/shame do you struggle with?
2.
Take it to the Lord - - He has conquered guilt.
FURTHER
READING:
Romans 8:1-4 (The Message paraphrase)
Lexi and her husband,
Andrew, have an adorable dog named Calvin. Lexi teaches sixth grade Reading and
Writing. She serves with Children’s Ministries and is the Fresh Start
Coordinator.
[1] Bunyan, Pilgrim’s Progress, chapter 3 (http://www.learnthebible.org/c_p_pilgrims_progress_chapter_3.htm)
