Despair
By Susan Klein
“Comfort, comfort
my people, says your God.”
I believe that every human being on the face of this earth
experiences despair or depression at some point in his/her life. Even Jesus
did. God created us with multi-faceted emotions that we are going to experience
when triggered. He also permits us to walk through trials and difficulties that
can/do often reap despair. Sometimes, our own body chemistry can go sort of
haywire, bringing about feelings of depression without any external triggers.
So, what should our response be when we see a friend walking through
a dark time of despair? While there is no “one perfect response” that fits all
circumstances, Charles Spurgeon (prolific author and preacher in the late
1800’s), who went through his own dark times of despair, offers some helpful
words on the subject.
“I know that wise brethren say, ‘You should not
give way to feelings of depression.’ … If those who blame quite so furiously
could once know what depression is, they would think it cruel to scatter blame
where comfort is needed. There are experiences of the children of God which are
full of spiritual darkness; and I am almost persuaded that those of God’s
servants who have been most highly favoured have, nevertheless, suffered more
times of darkness than others. No sin is necessarily connected with sorrow of
heart, for Jesus Christ our Lord once said, ‘My soul is exceeding sorrowful,
even unto death.’ There was no sin in Him, and consequently none in His deep
depression. I would, therefore, try to cheer any brother who is sad, for his
sadness is not necessarily blameworthy.” [1]
Depression hurts. It is an emotional pain that
is real. When someone we know is in pain, we offer comfort. Even if it might be
a time where sin is a component, there are things we definitely don’t do when
someone is hurting. We don’t place blame or play the Holy Spirit, we don’t try
to cover over the emotion, we don’t avoid…we just offer comfort. We speak
encouraging words, we give a hug or hold a hand, we listen, we pray, we make
ourselves available. It can be messy, and hard, and awkward, but it is oh-so-necessary.
And, as in the verse above, it is also commanded by our Heavenly Father.
GOING DEEPER:
1. What teachings or ideas might have (wrongly?) shaped your
typical response to depression?
2. How might you tangibly offer comfort the next time you see someone
struggling with despair or depression?
FURTHER READING:
Susan
is married to Mark, and co-leads an in-home small group. She serves as a mentor
to young women, and is a member of Oakwood’s Peace Team, helping people work
through conflict.
