Keeping Anger in Check
By Susan Klein
“In your anger do not sin. Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold.”
Ephesians 4:26-27
By Susan Klein
“In your anger do not sin. Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold.”
Ephesians 4:26-27
When my son was a little boy, he struggled
for a period of time with angry outbursts. As a young mom, I wasn’t quite sure
how to deal with this flaw in my “little angel’s” character. Surely my sweet
five-year old son couldn’t be exhibiting selfishness or pride, could he? As I
pored through many well-meaning parenting books trying to decide the best way
to handle this undesirable behavior, my son developed a unique way of his own
to deal with his anger. Whenever he felt the rage coming on, he would go
outside, jump on his swing, and pump as hard and as high as his little legs
would take him. As I’d sneak a peek out the window, I could always gauge the
intensity of his anger by how high and how long he swung. Only when he was
physically exhausted, and his anger depleted, would he come back in the house.
I remember sharing this with another mom one day while our boys shared a play day at the park. Her response caught me a little off guard. She told me her boys were taught that anger is sin. She also said that she did not allow them to express their anger, not even in a positive way. If they felt angry about something they were told to confess that anger to God right away and ask for forgiveness. While I understood her desire to avoid wrong behavior and teach them about repentance, I couldn’t help but wonder if she might be somewhat mistaken about what Scripture has to say about the emotion of anger.
Nowhere does it say that we are being sinful just by feeling angry. Scripture tells us that God created our inmost being which includes a full spectrum of emotions. He expects us to experience anger just as we experience joy or sorrow or any of our other emotions. The Bible does, however, tell us that we are not to sin in our anger. It’s our response to it that determines whether or not we are sinning. If, when we are angry, we respond by striking out verbally or physically, bringing harm to someone or something, then our actions (and the thoughts behind them) are sinful. If we take rightly-motivated anger and channel it positively like exercising, journaling or trying to promote change, we have not sinned. Let’s keep our anger in check by finding God-honoring ways to respond!
GOING DEEPER:
1. In what areas of your life does anger become a problem for you?
2. What are some tangible, positive steps you can take the next time you feel angry?
FURTHER READING:
I remember sharing this with another mom one day while our boys shared a play day at the park. Her response caught me a little off guard. She told me her boys were taught that anger is sin. She also said that she did not allow them to express their anger, not even in a positive way. If they felt angry about something they were told to confess that anger to God right away and ask for forgiveness. While I understood her desire to avoid wrong behavior and teach them about repentance, I couldn’t help but wonder if she might be somewhat mistaken about what Scripture has to say about the emotion of anger.
Nowhere does it say that we are being sinful just by feeling angry. Scripture tells us that God created our inmost being which includes a full spectrum of emotions. He expects us to experience anger just as we experience joy or sorrow or any of our other emotions. The Bible does, however, tell us that we are not to sin in our anger. It’s our response to it that determines whether or not we are sinning. If, when we are angry, we respond by striking out verbally or physically, bringing harm to someone or something, then our actions (and the thoughts behind them) are sinful. If we take rightly-motivated anger and channel it positively like exercising, journaling or trying to promote change, we have not sinned. Let’s keep our anger in check by finding God-honoring ways to respond!
GOING DEEPER:
1. In what areas of your life does anger become a problem for you?
2. What are some tangible, positive steps you can take the next time you feel angry?
FURTHER READING:
Susan is a We Women Bible Study
Coordinator and one of its teachers. She and her husband Mark enjoy tutoring
and working with inner-city youth.
