White Dress

By Elizabeth Cole

 “Teach us to number our days that we may gain a heart of wisdom.”

Psalm 90:12

There’s a white dress hanging in the back of my closet right now. Handmade by a Nashville relative, this treasure has tucks and pleats in all the right places, with a beautiful fabric flower artistically placed. From shoulder to toe, it’s a picture of precious youth, representing hope and a spiritual vision for the future. At just 30 inches long, it has clothed each of our baby daughters when my husband and I dedicated each one to the Lord Jesus.

There’s a white dress hanging in the back of my closet right now. This treasure has artful tucks and pleats in all the right places, with a beautiful fabric flower perfectly positioned. From shoulder to toe, it’s a picture of precious young adulthood, representing hope and a spiritual vision for the future. At quite a bit longer than 30 inches, it will clothe our oldest in two months when she marries her beloved.

So these two dresses hang side-by-side…and I marvel at how fast the 22 years in-between have raced. In Psalm 90, Moses comments upon how quickly life passes, and then the New Century Version of verse 12 reads, “Teach us how short our lives really are so that we may be wise.”

I love that it’s Moses who wrote that. At the age of 40, he rejected a privileged future as the son of Pharaoh’s daughter to identify with God’s people and with God’s plans. Rather than resting in a life planned out and comfortable, He chose to be about what lasts long beyond our short lives. Mistakes along the way? For sure, but Moses intentionally opted to make the days of his life count beyond the here and now…to invest them in a way that reaped eternal fruit, with a spiritual vision for the future. I wonder how often his mind turned to what matters most as he followed God’s leading in the middle of the craziness of life with millions of people in the desert.

Oh that we would be women of wisdom who have a spiritual vision for the future - - viewing each day in light of eternity. That we would live as women of hope, knowing that loving God and loving others matters most in the middle of the craziness of our lives. Today? It’s a treasure…spend it well!

GOING DEEPER:

1. What recalibration of your heart might need to take place to view each day as a treasure and to live it in light of what matters most? Talk to Jesus about that. Is it a conversation you can have with a friend?

2. Ask our God for the wisdom to live your life well.

FURTHER READING:

Hebrews 11:23-29; Mark 12:28-31; James 1:5, 4:14; Exodus 15:1-18

Elizabeth is a wife and mother of three grown daughters. She is the Director of Connecting and of We Women at Oakwood Church.

Staring Grace In The Face

By Karen D’Amore

“The grace of our Lord was poured out on me abundantly…”

1 Timothy 1:14a

It was a forty-plus-year addiction. Not one of the more common or familiar addictions, like tobacco, alcohol or drugs…but rather, a sun addiction! In the course of that addiction, I never considered the consequences. I can still hear my mother voicing her concerns, “I’m afraid you’re going to die from skin cancer.” My flippant response, “well, at least I’ll go down brown,” didn’t humor her!

The first skin cancer diagnosis stunned me. The tumor was on my lip and I couldn’t escape its presence staring back at me in the mirror. Paralyzed with fear, I didn’t want to face the consequential realities of my lifelong addiction. After numerous surgeries, months of painful radiation treatments, repetitive biopsies, and years of perpetual fear and concern…my sun worshipping addiction is behind me. But every time I look in the mirror, I witness the toll of that lifelong addiction. My skin has been destroyed!  The scars, wrinkles and sun spots recount a wordless autobiography. Dismayed by my self-induced destruction, the mirror reflects my shame. As I stare my consequences in the face, my reflection whispers, “You’re reaping what you sowed.” My heart groans with regret as I resign myself to forever live with the harsh residuals of my idol.

Recently, I was selected by a medical esthetician to be a test model for several restorative skin procedures. Unfamiliar with the process and procedures, I didn’t know what to expect. As the before and after photos speak for themselves, my face beams with renewal, leaving me speechless. I could have never afforded this costly, complimentary gift of services. A gift which has reversed years of damage and addictive destruction, leaving my skin transformed with newness of life. This undeserving gift was truly a gift of grace…the unmerited favor of God.

Through a frightening cancer diagnosis, God drew me to face my deadly addiction. And through a lengthy cancer battle, God delivered me from that addiction. Unable to escape the perpetual reminder of that addiction, the haunting consequences plagued me daily in the mirror. But as God extended His gift of grace…restoring my damaged face…I now look into the mirror…and rejoice as I stare grace in the face.

               

           "I don’t understand the mystery of grace 

only that it meets us where we are 

but doesn’t leave us where it found us.”

                                   —Anne Lamott (1)

GOING DEEPER:

1. Consider the many ways that God has shown you grace and express your gratitude to Him.

2. Is there someone in your life in need of your grace? How can you extend it to them?

FURTHER READING:

John 1:16; Psalm 41:4

(1) www.tentmaker.org

Married to Dan, Karen, a retired police officer, currently works as a Manicurist at Craig Berns Salon.  She’s a leader for Oakwood’s Tuesday a.m. Bible Study and a volunteer at the Wildlife In Need Center.

Chains That Bind, Chains That Free
By Elin Henderson

“So that it became evident to the whole palace guard, and to all the rest, that my chains are in Christ…”
Philippians 1:13 (NKJV)

Do you ever feel chained down to something? Maybe it is a job or boss you can’t stand. It could even be your children. Mothers of small children in particular often struggle with feeling homebound as they do nothing but chase little munchkins about all day wiping noses and cleaning up spills! Whatever it is, Paul, in his letter, to the Philippians gives us some great insight into his chains.

When imprisoned, Paul refused to see his chains from a human perspective; something that bound him, held him back, immobilized his life and progress. Instead he took a heavenly perspective. He saw them as springboards of freedom and opportunity! In Philippians 1:12-14 we learn Paul’s viewpoint: “But I want you to know, brethren, that the things which happened to me have actually turned out for the furtherance of the gospel, so that it has become evident to the whole palace guard, and to all the rest, that my chains are in Christ; and most of the brethren in the Lord, having become confident by my chains, are much more bold to speak the word without fear.”

Two things he claimed happened because of his chains (not in spite of them). One, he was able to share the Gospel with a huge population that otherwise would never have had a chance…the palace guard. Secondly, more believers grew in confidence and boldness to share the Good News when they saw his example.

When we can begin to view life with a divine perspective, these physical, mental, and emotional chains that bind us begin to become springboards of freedom and opportunity. Sometimes they are meant to slow us down a bit and help us to minister right where we are at…like Paul ministering directly to the guards by his side. Other times, they are lessons and encouragements to other believers to move forward with confidence. Either way, are we willing to endure them for the prize set before us?

Whether large or small, God desires that these chains in our lives would draw us closer to Himself, and that He could use us in the lives of others!

GOING DEEPER:
1. What are some chains in your life? How do you see these chains…as immobilizers or spring boards?

FURTHER READING:
2 Corinthians 1:3-4; 1 Peter 3:15

Oakwood’s missionaries Elin Henderson (a registered nurse) and her husband Phil serve as church planters with New Tribes in Mozambique, Africa.  Elin is mother to eleven-year-old Callie and nine-year-old Elias.

Are You Thrilled?

Psalm 98:1-4 (NLT)


It is good to give thanks to the Lord,

Father, I thank You today for_____________________________.


to sing praises to the Most High.

Here’s my song for You today: ___________________________________.


It is good to proclaim your unfailing love in the morning,

Whom shall I tell today about how You’ve loved me? __________________________.


your faithfulness in the evening,

I recall that time you were so faithful to me: _____________________________.


accompanied by the ten-stringed harp and the melody of the lyre.

I don’t play the harp or the lyre, but I can use my _______________________ to honor You today.


You thrill me, Lord, with all you have done for me!

What really overwhelms me about Your kindness is___________________________.


I sing for joy because of what you have done.

May the way I live be a life-song of joy to You today.

GOING DEEPER:
1. Start a running list of that for which you’re thankful to our God. Consider adding to it daily!
2. How are you training gratitude in your home?

FOR FURTHER READING:
Psalm 100

Remembering the Sacrifice

By Tracy Smith

“Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends.”

John 15:13

As my kids are getting ready to celebrate an extra day off of school on May 28, it occurred to me that we’ve lost the meaning of the Memorial Day holiday. We plan for the day off and all that we will do: have a picnic, sleep in, work in the yard or just nothing. Yet, the reason for the holiday gets lost in the shuffle and in the busy-ness of the day.

Memorial Day is a day set aside to honor those in our nation’s history who have sacrificed their very lives to keep us free. However, we get so preoccupied with utilizing our extra day of “freedom” from our normal, daily responsibilities, that we forget the purpose for the holiday: to remember and thank those that have sacrificed everything to keep us free.

Aren’t we like that with our Lord, too? We get so caught up serving Him in our church, in our homes and in our community that we forget to stop and actually thank God for all He has done for us. We forget to thank Him for the sacrifice He made on our behalf.

Today, let’s remember to just stop, be still and be thankful for the sacrifice that so many American soldiers have made for our physical freedom…and the sacrifice Jesus made on the cross to keep us free for eternity.

GOING DEEPER:
1. What will you do today to thank veterans for the physical freedoms you enjoy?
2. What will you do today to thank Jesus for the freedom you enjoy both now and for eternity?

FURTHER READING:
John 3:16; Galatians 5:1; John 8:36; Ephesians 5:20

Along with being a wife and mother to two boys, Tracy is an administrative assistant at Oakwood, serves on the Women’s Ministry Special Events Team and leads a great group of Junior High girls.

Shelter from the Storm

By Jen Wollner

“The name of the Lord is a strong tower; the righteous run into it and they are safe.”
Proverbs 18:10

When my son, Clayton, was young, he was extremely afraid of storms. Flashing lightning, crashing thunder and pounding rain literally made him tremble and weep. A couple of years ago, we had several days of thunderstorms in a row. We were all on edge and my husband and I were getting used to one kid or another running to us or crying during the night as the various sounds echoed around our home. One morning, when it was already light out, the rain woke me up and soon thereafter I saw a huge flash of lightning. The thunder followed immediately behind it and shook the whole house. I cringed and braced myself for what I knew I’d hear next…frantic feet running down the hall to my room! I waited…and waited…but, no one came. No feet. No crying. No panicked calls for Mommy and Daddy.

Hmmm…that’s strange, I thought. There’s no way none of them heard that, especially Clayton. Is it possible that he slept through it?!

As I lay in bed, my mind turned to other things and soon I drifted back to sleep. Not too long later, Clayton came into our room and jumped in bed with us, just as he did most mornings. He seemed particularly excited and pleased with himself, though, and the first thing out of his mouth was, “Mom, did you hear that loud thunder?” “Yeah, did you hear it, too?” I asked him with much shock. “Yep!” he said. “And I was really scared at first, but then I remembered that God was with me and I wasn’t scared anymore!” Well, there’s nothing that gives me more joy then when my children trust in the Lord and look to Him to fill their needs. And, I was overwhelmed with gratitude that God would so quickly and supernaturally meet that need. What a promise-keeping God!

We all struggle with fears and worries, don’t we? Maybe it’s a health issue. Maybe it’s a financial dilemma. Maybe it’s a difficult relationship. Or, maybe it’s something more tangible like spiders, heights or, like my son, severe weather. Whatever it is, it fills us with panic and all we can think about is getting away…being rescued…finding shelter.

The Lord is that place. He’s the place of security when the storms of life crash down on us. He’s a strong tower when everything is falling apart around us. He is our Rock, our Fortress, our Deliverer.

Run to Him…

GOING DEEPER:
1. What causes you to tremble? From what do you need protection? Seek the Lord and expect Him save you and fill you with courage!

FURTHER READING:
Psalm 18:2; Psalm 91; Isaiah 41:10-14

Jen and her husband are busily parenting three elementary-aged children. She serves on the leadership team for Mission: Hope, Oakwood’s orphan care ministry.

Joyful Concert
By Peggy Kleckner

“Shout for joy to the LORD, all the earth, burst into jubilant song with music; make music to the LORD with the harp, with the harp and the sound of singing, with trumpets and the blast of the ram’s horn – shout for joy before the LORD, the King.”
Psalm 98:4-6

I have been enjoying a concert since early spring….right outside my front window! First came the tips of daffodils boldly proclaiming their presence, followed by their bouncy yellow blooms. Next came the tulips spattered about in different colors…a few here, a few over there. Each type of plant showed up for its part in displaying His splendor. Each group proudly pushing up past the dirt, taking time to sprout leaves and set down roots before producing its blossoms.

Oh, but the wonderful sway of the most recent music! Triumphal shouts of irises boldly proclaiming their colors. Big leaves followed by tall shoots that burst into blooms! This year was the first for some of those colors. What a treasured surprise. To add to the fun, they showed up while my mom was visiting from Florida. Each day we viewed yet another added color. We enjoyed the playful staccato notes of daises, as well as the wispy featherlike tinklings of paper irises. How like God to add joy to my days. What a delicious experience to share with my mother.

Some days, I wonder what the music is. I think of all of the instruments in an orchestra or a band and I imagine which ones would play the part of the tulip, the daffodil, the daisy. Are my irises trumpets? Are the daisies piccolos? It just sets the mind to giggling. Oh, how He must delight in my delight!

May each of us also be willing to bloom for His glory and the delight of those around us!

GOING DEEPER:
1. What joyful surprises has He placed in your days recently?
2. Are you blooming according to His timing, or are you trying to compete with those planted around you? Who plans the concert, you or God?

FURTHER READING:
Isaiah 61:11; Genesis2:4-9; Jeremiah 17:7-8

Peggy is a wife and mother of four adult children - - two sons and two stepsons, and is an active encourager at Oakwood Church in Delafield. She serves as the Coordinator of Fresh Start.

Shh...It’s a Secret!

By Susan Klein

“Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed.” 

James 5:16

My daughter will testify to the fact that secret-keeping is a difficult concept for a four-year-old. When she was small, we had purchased a new fishing pole for my husband as a Father’s Day gift. My nine-year-old son cautioned her not to give up our secret while she bubbled over with excitement. As we walked along the river one day enjoying the view, my husband mentioned how he’d like to fish there sometime. My daughter proudly replied that he’d soon be able to with his new fishing pole!

As the kids grew older, secret-keeping took on a different aspect. Once in school and having other children telling them secrets, it then became apparent that we had to redefine when it was and wasn’t appropriate to keep a secret. We always said that if it was something that could be harmful to themselves or to someone else, it should be shared with an adult who could help. As a sophomore in high school, my son learned this very difficult lesson with a peer who was involved in drug usage. He reluctantly shared the situation with us, fearing what it might do to his friendship. It was good for him to see that God honored his coming forward by providing much needed help for his friend and no repercussions for himself.

As adults, we can struggle with our own form of secret-keeping. We tend to keep our sins, especially habitual ones, a secret. We sometimes wrongly believe that as long as they aren’t hurting anyone else, we don’t need to share them. While it is true that we only need to confess our sins to our heavenly Father, God didn’t create us to go it alone on this earth. He graciously gives us others to walk alongside of us, to lift us up when we fall, to pray for us, and to hold us accountable so we don’t stay trapped in the same sin patterns. Confession to another person may be just the thing God uses to help put an end to a secret sinful habit. Or conversely, sharing our victory over a secret sin issue may be just what someone else needs to break free from theirs.

Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work: if one falls down, his friend can help him up. Ecclesiastes 4:9-10

GOING DEEPER:

1. In what ways are you prepared to help someone who confides in you that they are struggling with a secret sin?

2. Are you struggling with anything that an accountability partner might be beneficial in pursuing?

FURTHER READING:

Proverbs 27:17, 28:13

Susan is a We Women Bible Study Coordinator and one of its teachers. She and her husband Mark lead a couples' small group in their home; she is also involved in inner city outreach.

Expanded Gratitude
By Susan Klein

“In everything give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you.”
1Thessalonians 5:18 (KJV)

Have you ever read a familiar passage of Scripture over and over again, only to have it all of a sudden pop out at you with a whole new concept?! This happened to me recently.

In the New International Version, the above verse says “give thanks in all circumstances.” I’ve read that passage many times and have always taken it to mean that even when things are not going particularly well, I should still find a reason to be thankful to my Creator, perhaps even thanking Him for the difficult circumstance that may be facing me. While this is certainly accurate thinking, as I read this verse in the King James Version, it took on another perspective for me. Notice it does not mention circumstances, but just says; in everything, give thanks. I had to pause to consider the depth of this meaning.

The word, “everything,” used above, is literally all things in their totality, but also each thing within that totality. Let me give you an example. I love to read books. It would only be natural, then, for me to thank God for books. But, considering the totality, I would have to thank Him for eyes to see the book, a brain to interpret it, hands to hold it...and so on. And I could also thank Him for the author who wrote it, and for inspiring the author and gifting her with talent to write. And, I might even thank Him for paper, and publishers, and printers, and bookstores and money to purchase the book...You get the idea!

Now, I suppose one could argue that this thankfulness could go on for hours and hours and eat up valuable time that could be spent on other things. Nevertheless, it is a useful exercise to show us that we should not take anything for granted. We must awaken each day with immediate thoughts of thankfulness for breath, and life and movement. And as we go through our day, we must embrace the mundane things like floors, and pencils and toothpaste as things for which to be thankful.

We came into this world with nothing. Everything we are and have is from our Heavenly Creator. If we take the time to specifically thank Him, even for the tiny things, it will grow in us an “attitude of expanded gratitude.” The more we thank Him who is worthy of our thanks, the more we will find to be thankful for!

GOING DEEPER:
1. Take some time to try this exercise. Think of one thing, in its totality, for which you are thankful.

FURTHER READING:
Psalm 30:12; James 1:17

Susan is We Women's Tuesday Morning Bible Study Coordinator and one of its teachers. She and her husband Mark lead a couples' small group in their home; she is also involved in inner city outreach.

Love Wins
By Elizabeth Cole

As I walked through a parking lot yesterday, mind and heart heavy with the sadnesses of life, I passed this bumper sticker: Love Wins.

It’s true. Regardless of the way things are right now, irrespective of loss and pain and sorrow and injustice and hurt…we’ve read the back of the book. Love Wins. When all’s finally said and done once and for all, Love Wins.

So we're not giving up. How could we! Even though on the outside it often looks like things are falling apart on us, on the inside, where God is making new life, not a day goes by without his unfolding grace. These hard times are small potatoes compared to the coming good times, the lavish celebration prepared for us. There's far more here than meets the eye. The things we see now are here today, gone tomorrow. But the things we can't see now will last forever. (2 Corinthians 4:16-18, MSG)

Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth, for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and there was no longer any sea. I saw the Holy City, the new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride beautifully dressed for her husband. And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, "Now the dwelling of God is with men, and he will live with them. They will be his people, and God himself will be with them and be their God. He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.” (Revelation 21:1-4)

No longer will there be any curse. The throne of God and of the Lamb will be in the city, and his servants will serve him. They will see his face, and his name will be on their foreheads. There will be no more night. They will not need the light of a lamp or the light of the sun, for the Lord God will give them light. And they will reign forever and ever. (Revelation 22:3-5)

Beloved, Love Wins. Will you trust Love today…regardless? He offers you His perspective; He offers you His comfort; He offers you His help, His strength, His perseverance, Himself. Love Wins.

GOING DEEPER:
1. Do you need to remind someone of this truth today?

Elizabeth is a wife, mother to three grown daughters, and Director of Connecting and Women’s Ministries at Oakwood Church.

Spiritual Resumé
By Elin Henderson

“I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that you present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable unto God, which is your reasonable act of service.”
Romans 12:1 (NKJV)

If you had to hand in a “Spiritual Resumé” to God, what would it look like? What should it include? Let’s think…name, date of salvation, service (type and years of), gifts, abilities, strengths and weaknesses, history of your walk with Him and of course a list of why He should hire you, right?


I can see myself writing a flourishing report of my years of service, my faithful walk, my wonderful gifts, etc. then confidently handing it over to the Lord knowing that He has just found Himself one great servant! How has He been doing it all without me? I will be a great addition to His team!


While all of these things are good, there is one that is far superior. Our experiences and our “spiritual walk” over the years can and do give us wisdom and maturity, but if we rely on that, we set ourselves up for pride’s fall. Thirty years of faithful service and walking with Him do not guarantee that tomorrow I won’t fall into serious sin. Most of the time, our accomplishments will hinder rather than help us. Our flesh and pride are unable to lay them aside…preferring to open them up for all to see and relive the glory days. How we love to write and flash about our resumés.


So, before we start hauling out our lists of accomplishments and expounding on our many gifts and abilities, perhaps we should stop and consider the following: Where am I at today? Am I available? What kind of resume do you think the Lord is looking for? Glowing lists? Or, a giant bold stamp covering it all that says “AVAILABLE”?


May that be our utmost goal as we present ourselves as servants to Him!


GOING DEEPER:
1. Has the Lord been calling you to any specific task or ministry? What kind of needs do you see around you? Can you identify where the Lord is using you, maybe even beyond your skills or gifts? Step out in faith. Hand in your resumé stamped, “Available!” and see where it leads you.


FURTHER READING:
Ephesians 6:7; Galatians 5:13; Hebrews 12:28

Oakwood’s missionaries Elin Henderson (a registered nurse) and her husband Phil serve as church planters with New Tribes in Mozambique, Africa.  Elin is mother to eleven-year-old Callie and nine-year-old Elias.

Pondering

By Peggy Kleckner

“….and all who heard it were amazed at what the shepherds said to them. But Mary treasured  up all these things and pondered  them in her heart. The shepherds returned, glorifying and praising God for all the things they had heard and seen, which were just as they had been told.” 

Luke 2:18-20

Motherhood…what a job! It brings to mind babies, cooking, dishes, carpooling, homework wars, constant motion and little rest. But here at the beginning of Mary’s motherhood role, we find her treasuring and pondering. Not just that, but she was doing it “in her heart,” that deep-seated place of our true self.

I love the two concepts God chose here: “treasured” and “pondered.” Just sit with those words for a moment.  What happens when we “treasure” something? What happens when we “ponder” something? I may see my child every day, but if I stop to “treasure” him, what changes? What happens when I linger to “ponder” on his growth and change, or my own?

Concerning each of her children, how much time do you think your own mother spent in doing these two things, treasuring and pondering their life-circumstances from the time of conception to the present?  If you are a mom, how often have you found yourself treasuring or pondering specific moments and happenings?

Life seems fast-paced, hectic, ongoing. We rush. We fuss. We do. How much do we “treasure” and “ponder”?  How much time do we spend in the secret recesses of our hearts? What moments, what “things,” do we take there to ponder on?

Since God chose to mention this in Scripture, might He be confirming this practice? Shouldn’t there be time set aside in the rush to step aside in wonder at life? Shouldn’t we ponder the workings of His mighty hand in our lives, and in the lives of our children?

Stop the motion today, if only for a moment, to practice the art of treasuring and pondering…

GOING DEEPER:

1.  Consider where in your week you might make the time to “stop” and engage in some treasuring and pondering of your own.

2.  If you’re able, how about asking your own mom what she has treasured and pondered about your life, as well as her own?

FURTHER READING:

Psalm 64:9; Psalm 111:2; Proverbs 2:1-5; Luke 2:51

Peggy is a wife and mother of four adult children - - two sons and two stepsons, and is an active encourager at Oakwood Church in Delafield. She serves as the Coordinator of Fresh Start.

Focus

By Tracy Smith

“Before I shaped you in the womb, I knew all about you. Before you saw the light of day, I had holy plans for you: A prophet to the nations - - that's what I had in mind for you."

Jeremiah 1:5 (MSG)

It is so easy, as women, to have our focus in the wrong direction. The world bombards us with images of all we should or shouldn’t be, and many times the messages oppose each other. It’s impossible to figure out which message to listen to, and more impossible to live up to the expectations. Then we see that woman that has what we want. Jealousy sets in and we think, “I want to be like her.”  I cannot tell you the number of times I wished I was the more “prim and proper” sort who did more listening than talking and when she did talk, used a quiet, reserved voice. Those who know me are chuckling as they try to imagine that  scenario - - it’s just not me.

While reading the magazine Just Between Us, I came across a couple of truths that I have been unable to get out of my mind. “Getting a New View of You,” was an interview with Andrea Stephens, founder of a ministry called B.A.B.E.™ that reaches out to “teen girls to help them see themselves as God sees them - - beautiful, accepted, blessed and eternally significant. She teaches them they are created on purpose and for  a pur-pose.”1   Wait a minute - - God created me the way I am -- loud talking, not prim and proper personality and all? I’ve been learning this lesson slowly over the past five years as God has been using various people and events to show me that He created me a certain way for a reason, and that I should embrace that and thank Him for it. 

Then, Andrea was asked:

“JBU: It is so easy to compare ourselves with other women. How do we keep from being envious of others?

Andrea:  It takes concerted effort. Someone else’s looks, talents, or personality is not better or worse than ours - - just different. When we start thinking we wish we had someone else’s thick hair or winsome ways or ability to be organized, that is the time to stop and thank God for giving those things to her. Then ask Him to bless her. This helps guard our heart from jealousy.” (1)

Wow! That just spoke to me and is something I have not heard before. In order to not be jealous, pray for the person and thank God for giving her those things and ask God to bless her. Amazing insight!

Taking the focus off of ourselves and putting it onto God and what He has done for someone else is a wonderful concept I cannot wait to try!

GOING DEEPER:

1. If there is someone you know whom you have jealous feelings toward, will you take the time to do what Andrea suggests and pray for her?

2.  Think about something you do not like about yourself and think about how God could use that for Him.

FURTHER READING:

Psalm 139:1; Romans 12:4-8; Isaiah 64:8

(1)  Fink, Constance B. “Getting a New View of You.” Just Between Us Summer 2012: 18-21. Print

Along with being a wife and mother to two boys, Tracy is an administrative assistant at Oakwood, serves on the Women’s Ministry Special Events Team and leads a great group of Junior High girls.

Are you a “REAL MOTHER”?
By Pamela Blattner

“I thank my God always on your behalf, for the grace of God which is given you.”
1 Corinthians 1:4 (KJV)

In one of his Mother’s Day sermons, evangelist Jeff Strite defined what a “real mother” was like. He began his message by saying:

• Real Mothers are special people.
• Real mothers would like to be able to eat a whole candy bar (all by themselves) and drink a Coke without any "floaters" in it.
• Real Mothers know that their kitchen utensils are probably going to end up in the sandbox.
• Real Mothers often have sticky floors, filthy ovens and happy kids.
• Real Mothers know that dried play-doh doesn’t come out of shag carpets.
• Real Mothers sometimes ask "Why me?" and get their answer when a little voice says, "Because I love you best."
• Real Mothers know that a child’s growth is not measured by height or years or grade. It is marked by the progression of Mama to Mom to Mother... (1)

To you Real Mothers, know that through all your hardships, God loves you. To those who long to be mothers, know that through all your hardships, God loves you. To those who are mourning the loss of a mother, God loves you.

Mothers need to know their families appreciate them. Mothers desperately need to let go of the “supermom” myth that pervades our culture. And moms need to focus on the ultimate reward of motherhood: that they made a difference in the lives of their children...that they were faithful to God’s leading in their parenting…period.

God chooses ordinary people to do amazing jobs; in this case, He chooses women to be mothers. This Mother’s Day, I pray that you had a special day. I ask the Lord to bless you with another day in which He reminds you how much He loves you for who you are and appreciates all that you give to your family. I would like to take this day to honor you for being faithful and Real Mothers, and for being God’s extension of His sacrificial love.

GOING DEEPER:
1. If you’re a mom, what part of the “supermom” myth do you need to toss?
2. Grab some alone time with God today and ask Him to show you how you can encourage a mom you know.

FURTHER READING:
1 Corinthians 13:4-7; Philippians 4:8; Ephesians 6:1-3; Proverbs 11:16, 23:25

(1) http://www.sermoncentral.com/sermons/the-man-with-two-mothers-jeff-strite-sermon-on-mothers-122359.asp

Pam and her husband Richard have two adult children and two grandchildren. She formerly served Oakwood through its Family Care Ministries.

Try, Try Again...?

By Susan Klein

"Are you so foolish? After beginning with the Spirit, are you now trying to attain your goal by human effort?"  
Galatians 3:3

How precious it was to watch the tiny sparrow flitting in and out of her new home!  I had dried a large gourd over the winter and hollowed it out with the intent of using it as a birdhouse this spring. I strategically hung it just outside my screen porch window so I could keep an eye out for any winged visitors. This was the day!

She busily gathered bits and pieces of this and that from the yard and surrounding woods, carefully carrying them back to her new abode. Often she’d stop, alertly perched on the post above to make sure there were no predators nearby before disappearing inside the gourd. On one of her comings and goings, I noticed a twig in her beak that was more than twice her size. As she approached the tiny opening and tried to place her find inside, its length became a hindrance. After much pushing and shoving, it eventually fell to the ground where a pile of many other failed attempts had gathered. I guess she hadn’t learned from her earlier struggles.

I started to think about my own life. How many times had I tried to repeatedly do something only to continue to fail? Like the time I committed to only using “kind words” when speaking to my husband. Each time a critical or harsh word flew out of my mouth, I felt my pile of mistakes growing. Like the sparrow, I had good intentions but hadn’t learned from my previous mistakes.

Unlike the sparrow, we are not foolish creatures without the ability to reason. We also have the privilege of seeking help from our heavenly Father. Once I committed my failures to God in prayer, and asked for His power to be made perfect in my weakness, things started to change for the better. I also spent some time learning about breaking bad habits. I discovered that any pattern of behavior developed over a long period of time generally takes a long period of time to change. And one significant way to bring about change is by replacing  the negative words/actions with positive words/actions. Now, when I feel a negative thought starting to form into words, I ask the Holy Spirit to give me something positive to say instead.

Learning this new habit hasn’t come easily and I’m nowhere near a 100% success rate. But, let’s just say that my pile of failed attempts is significantly dwindling!

GOING DEEPER:

Might you have a habit that you are currently struggling with? Even if you’ve already committed it to God in prayer, try asking Him to help you find a positive replacement action to practice.

FURTHER READING:

Isaiah 41:10; Ephesians 3:16; Philippians 4:13

Susan is We Women's Tuesday Morning Bible Study Coordinator and one of its teachers. She and her husband Mark lead a couples' small group in their home; she is also involved in inner city outreach.

The God Who Sees
By Carolyn Hulliberger

“…You are the God who sees me…”
Genesis 16:13

Imagine a young, unmarried, pregnant woman with no home, no family, and no future. She has no education, no means of providing for the child she carries. She has been used and abandoned emotionally by the child’s father, treated harshly by his family. Seeing no other options, she runs away. The future is bleak…there is no one to help…what will become of her?

When all appears hopeless, an angel of the LORD comes to her. He speaks to her…the unwed mother…the homeless wanderer. He has specific instructions from God himself. She is to name her son “God hears.” God will make her descendents too numerous to count. He has a plan for HER! Her response, in what I imagine to be an astonished whisper, is, “I have now seen the One who sees me.” She has not been abandoned….she has been seen by a God who cares deeply about her and her unborn child. And while the angel instructs her to return to her child’s father, she is no longer alone.

This is no “Movie of the Week.” It is the story of Hagar, an Egyptian slave and the mother of Abraham’s first son, Ishmael. The culture of the Old Testament book of Genesis allowed masters to keep slaves, to treat the slaves as they wished, and for female slaves to bear children in place of their master’s wives. On the ladder of society, these female slaves were the bottom rung. They were given no rights, no freedoms, no opinions. Surely God would not take notice of one such as this.

Have you ever felt like God doesn’t notice what’s going on in your life? That you couldn’t be important to Him? “Hagar’s God is the One who numbers the hairs on our heads and who knows our circumstances, past, present, and future.” (1) In our places of desolation, God is intimately aware of our hurts, our troubles, our sorrows. His care for us is personal, intimate and individual. The psalmist writes, “I lift up my eyes to the hills…where does my help come from? My help comes from the LORD, the Maker of heaven and earth…The LORD will keep you from all harm…he will watch over your life; the LORD will watch over your coming and going both now and forevermore” Psalm 121: 1-2, 7-8.

Know today that God sees you, He cares about you, and you are never alone.

GOING DEEPER:
1. Are you feeling weak in the face of today’s challenges? Pray for strength to keep your eyes fixed on the One who sees you.
2. How have you experienced God’s watchful care?

FURTHER READING:
2 Chronicles 16:9; Proverbs 15:3

(1) © 2004. Praying the Names of God, Ann Spangler, page 27.

Along with caring for her husband, two children and the dog, Carolyn serves Oakwood Church in Student Ministries with an awesome group of junior high girls, and is the treasurer for Women’s Ministries. 

Wanted
By Sarah Kosanke

“Christ arrives right on time to make this happen. He didn't, and doesn't, wait for us to get ready. He presented himself for this sacrificial death when we were far too weak and rebellious to do anything to get ourselves ready. And even if we hadn't been so weak, we wouldn't have known what to do anyway. We can understand someone dying for a person worth dying for, and we can understand how someone good and noble could inspire us to selfless sacrifice. But God put his love on the line for us by offering his Son in sacrificial death while we were of no use whatever to him.”
Romans 5:6-8 (MSG)

Do you have something in your life that hangs you up? Maybe it’s a mistake that the devil doesn't let you forget, even when it’s long forgiven and forgotten by God? How about an old pattern of sin in your life that you thought you'd outgrown? Until, that is, it comes back as a painful reminder of “guess you’re not as mature as you thought!” It really does get a girl feeling pretty down.

The last few days I've been thinking about how useless I am to God...and, in reality, I am. Surprising concept to grasp, but we are not needed by Him, nor is He dependent on us. We’re not His little sidekicks whom He desperately needs to valiantly fight the enemy and ruin life as we know it. That is a depressing thought because I want to help God fight evil, I want to stomp Satan back to the fiery pits of hell where he belongs. But God has something better in mind for us. He doesn’t need us, He wants us.

To be wanted is a much better feeling then to be needed. I will admit, though, I like being needed. Sometimes, when I have a skill or knowledge that only I can bring to the table, you better believe it pumps my ego to use it and show it off. But I've got nothing to show off to God. He's seen it all, He designed such skills and nothing compares to His skill levels and knowledge.

Romans 5:6-8 says it beautifully. While we were of no use to God, He put His love on the line for the worthless. He put His Son on the line to make you and me worth something He could be around. Not because He needed us...no...He wants us! He wants you regardless of what you've done in your life, or what you could ever possibly do. He is pursuing you because you are special to Him!

GOING DEEPER:
1. Do you struggle to believe that God wants you, not for something you've done, but just because He loves you? Talk with Him today about your unbelief.

FURTHER READING:
Romans 7:7-25, Jeremiah 15:19

Sarah is a single young lady who is in school to become a registered nurse. When she is not busy at clinical or studying for her next exam, she teaches Sunday School for the 5th and 6th grade girls at Oakwood Church.

God’s Will for Us

By Susan Klein

“Be very careful, then, how you live - - not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil. Therefore, do not be foolish, but understand what the Lord’s will is.” 

Ephesians 5:15-17

Have you ever questioned God’s specific will for your life? Don’t we all want to make choices that are pleasing to Him and within His will? Have you ever feared making a wrong decision? Perhaps you’ve considered a job change or a move to a different location, praying for God’s will to be accomplished. Maybe you are faced with more than one choice in a particular situation and are agonizing over which one fits into God’s will. It can get rather frustrating at times! So, how can we really know what His will is?

According to the verse above, we are to understand  what the Lord’s will is. While we don’t necessarily know the thoughts or the mind of God (Isaiah 55:8), we can know for sure some Scriptural truths about His will for us. For example, in the Gospel of Luke we are instructed to love the Lord our God with all our heart, soul, strength and mind, and love our neighbor as ourselves. If we are doing this, we are in His will. The above verse instructs us to live as wise, not as unwise. It would be safe to say it is His will for us to be wise in our decision-making process. So, what happens if we make an unwise decision?  Part of God’s will is letting us make choices, and then experiencing the results of those choices. God may allow us to exercise our individual will in a given situation, but He is always able to control the outcomes to accomplish what His sovereign will has deemed. He is God, and He will do as He pleases (Daniel 4:35).

God foreknew all the choices we would and will make in our lifetime. He can allow us to make a decision, or He can stop us. It is all within His will. In other words, even if we make a mistake, He will use the outcome to accomplish His desired result (Proverbs 16:4). Nothing we can do will thwart His plan (Job 42:2). We need not be fearful or become frustrated when we aren’t sure what God’s will is. We just need to cling to the truth of His Word, knowing that He is sovereign and accomplishes all things in His due time. There really is much comfort in that truth!

GOING DEEPER:

Do you struggle with making decisions, fearing that you might go against God’s will for your life? Will you trust in His sovereignty more than your choices?

FURTHER READING:

Psalm 143:10; Ephesians 6:6; 1 John 2:17

Susan is We Women's Tuesday Morning Bible Study Coordinator and one of its teachers. She and her husband Mark lead a couples' small group in their home; she is also involved in inner city outreach.

Over-the-Top
By Elin Henderson

“That you may walk worthy of the Lord fully pleasing Him, being fruitful in every good work…strengthened with all might according to His glorious power…”
Colossians 1:10-11 (NKJV)

Do you ever feel that God’s demands are “over-the-top”? Unrealistic? Just plain too much? A careful study of the different commands and challenges He sets out for us in Scripture reveals this concept even further. Notice how many times He uses “all,” “every,” “always,” “everything.” “Go ye into all the world…preach the gospel to every creature” (Mark 16:15). “In everything give thanks” (1 Thessalonians 5:18). “Rejoice in the Lord always” (Philippians 4:4). “Warn every man…teach every man…present every man perfect” (Colossians 1:28).

Wow! Seems a little over the top to me! How about, “most men”? We can do that, right? How about “give thanks some of the time”? That isn’t too hard. But, all the time, all men? Come on, God, aren’t your expectations just a little too high?

Yes, the expectations are high, but lest we get discouraged, know that just as high and even higher are His all encompassing grace and strength. Look at how He speaks about what is available to us. “All power is given unto you…” (Matthew 28:18). “All wisdom…all might…according to His all glorious power” (Colossians 1:10). “Lo I am with you always” (Matthew 28:20). “Everything you need for life and godliness” (2 Peter 1:3). “I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength” (Philippians 4:13). “Now to Him who is able to do all that we could ask or think” (Ephesians 3:20).

God never gives us a task that He Himself has not already provided the strength, wisdom, might, power or abundance in advance to handle. If it were up to us, we’d have the right to be overwhelmed and over-the-top discouraged. In ourselves, we will never be able to muster up the strength (try as we may) and God never intended for us to do so. As always, He desires that we look to Him for strength for each moment of each day.

So, next time you get discouraged at the task ahead of you, or run across a challenge in Scripture that you think is just too much to handle, keep reading. You will always find that while the challenge is great, the provisions are greater in Him!

“For with Him all things are possible!” (Matthew 19:26).

GOING DEEPER:
1. What specific challenge or command has the Lord been speaking to your heart? What verses can you find that supply you with the strength in Him to do it?

FURTHER READING:
Look up the verses listed above.

Oakwood’s missionaries Elin Henderson (a registered nurse) and her husband Phil serve as church planters with New Tribes in Mozambique, Africa.  Elin is mother to eleven-year-old Callie and nine-year-old Elias.

Fresh Starts
By Susan Klein

“The faithful love of the Lord never ends! His mercies never cease. Great is his faithfulness; his mercies begin afresh each morning.”
Lamentation 3:22-23 (NLT)

What image comes to your mind when you hear the words “fresh start”? Perhaps it is a picture of a farmer in the springtime, tilling the earth to cultivate the hard, dry, top crust and bringing up the rich, dark, nutrient-laden soil beneath before planting his new crop. Or, maybe it’s that of a person relocating to a new city and a new job, getting a fresh start in a different place. It could even be the image of a prisoner who has been incarcerated for many long years, has finally served his term, and is now walking through the gate to freedom. He has paid his debt to society and has been given the chance to have a fresh start in life.

Have you ever longed for a fresh start in your life? Maybe you’ve had a broken relationship that was never mended and you wish you had another chance to work things out. Or, perhaps you’ve made some costly decisions or choices, and you wish you could make them over again. I think we’ve all had times like these in our lives. Sometimes we get past them, but occasionally the regret hangs on so tight that we feel as if we might just suffocate! We wonder how God could possibly love us or forgive us when we’ve made such a mess of things.

“If only I could have a fresh start...”

God’s Word tells us that His mercies begin afresh each morning! Not just once a year or once in a lifetime, but He wipes the slate clean each and every morning. What a wonderful way to wake up each day! We don’t have to be burdened with the transgressions of our past, but rather, like the incarcerated man who has been released, we can walk through the gate to freedom! Unlike that man, though, we have no sentence to serve. Jesus served it for us when He chose to hang on the cross in our place. We were forgiven of all our sins - past, present and future. We were given a “fresh start.” All we have to do is believe it, and accept it. It’s that simple!

GOING DEEPER:
1. As soon as your eyes open tomorrow morning, while you are still snug under the covers, focus your mind on God’s mercies that are fresh for the day! Have a little pre-getting-up chat with the Father. In what specific way do you need to experience His mercy today?

FURTHER READING:
1 Peter 1: 3-4; Numbers 6: 24-26; Ezekiel 36: 26-27; Hebrews 4:16; Psalm 25:6-7

Susan is We Women's Tuesday Morning Bible Study Coordinator and one of its teachers. She and her husband Mark lead a couples' small group in their home; she is also involved in inner city outreach.

“Do You Love Me?”
By Elizabeth Cole

“Again Jesus said, ‘Simon, son of John, do you truly love me?’”
John 21:16

I’ve been thinking about that poignant moment in the second act of Fiddler on the Roof where Tevye asks Golde, his wife of 25 years, if she loves him. Tevye is intrigued by his daughter’s love for a young man and it causes him to tentatively ask, “Golde…do you love me?” She quickly brushes off the question as simply a sign of indigestion, given all the stress and trouble that’s taking place in their turn-of-the-century village. But he persists…“Golde, I’m asking you a question…do you love me?”

And here’s the part that has caused me to dwell on this scene lately. Golde answers, “For twenty-five years I've washed your clothes, cooked your meals, cleaned your house, given you children, milked the cow…” How quickly her mind moves to actions…good actions, for sure. Basically, she’s replying, “Good grief, look at everything I’ve done for you! I’ve spent my whole adult life doing things for you…”

How often does that become our answer when we stop to think about how we love Jesus? “Lord, of course, I love you. Look at everything I’ve been doing for you. In fact, I’ve spent my whole adult life doing things for you…” The tone of voice in my mind uncomfortably echoes what I imagine Martha’s to be when her friend Jesus came to visit. While her sister Mary sits with Jesus, Martha does things for Jesus. Martha’s about accomplishments and results; Mary’s about first things first.

Love is first. Henri Nouwen writes of Jesus’ exchange with Peter as He restores him, “He whose only concern had been to announce the unconditional love of God had only one question to ask, ‘Do you love me?’ The question is not: How many people take you seriously? How much are you going to accomplish? Can you show some results? But: Are you in love with Jesus?” (1)

Am I in love with Jesus? Am I in love with One who laid aside every divine right in order to obey the Father and drag a way-too-heavy cross up a hill? Am I in love with the One who calmly tells the wind to cool it, tenderly holds a child, and speaks unvarnished truth for the sake of Love? Do I love Him as my First Love, with fervency and passion…with all my heart and soul and mind and strength?

Actions matter…for sure. But His question’s got to be answered first: Do you love me?

GOING DEEPER:
What will you do today to be with Jesus?

FURTHER READING:
Mark 12:30-31; Luke 10; John 21; Philippians 2; Revelation 2:1-7

(1) Henri J.M. Nouwen, In the Name of Jesus, The Crossroad Publishing Company, New York, p. 37

Elizabeth is a wife, mother to three grown daughters, and Director of Connecting and Women’s Ministries at Oakwood Church.