Monday, July 11, 2016

Reconciliation and Redemption-The Letter
By Jeannine Sawall

For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the LORD. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.”

It had started out as an ordinary day. My husband and children were gone, and so I had a small window of time to be alone. As I pieced through the mail, there was a letter addressed to me. So preoccupied with what should be for dinner, I didn’t really look at the sender’s name. I opened up the letter and began to read:

“Dear Jeannine,
You should probably sit down as you read this…”

Oh great! My first thought was it was one of those “send a dollar to the first name on this list and in six months you’ll be a millionaire” letters. I read on:

I want you to know I have never stopped thinking of you. This is Larry and I am your_____________.”

I stopped reading as my heart began to pound. This letter was from my biological father with whom I had had almost no contact during my life. The letter said he had always wanted to have a relationship with me, but things in his life had made it difficult. As the years went on, he felt he had lost the right to even ask for one. He wanted to meet me and then let me decide how I’d like to proceed, if at all, with a relationship.

I started to cry. I had no idea hearing from him would cause such strong emotions within me.  Why now? Why not before? I was challenged to be available to God to work in me and through me. As I considered what God might be orchestrating, I also had fears, “What if he doesn’t like me?” “What if I don’t like him?” But there was one fear that stopped me in my tracks.  “Lord, if you are sending Larry now because you are planning on taking my mom, then I DON’T want him.” I wasn’t sure what the Lord was doing and I wasn’t sure I was ready to go where He was leading. But I also knew His ways are not my ways and so I knew I had to trust Him.

This letter was unexpected but I now had a choice with how I would respond, and if I would trust God’s leading. Tomorrow, we’ll see the next part of this incredible story where God chose to teach me about reconciliation and redemption.

GOING DEEPER:
  1. When something out of the ordinary happens, how do you recognize God’s hand in it?
  2. What do you do when fear makes you question the path God is taking you down?


FURTHER READING:

Jeannine is a wife and mother of four great boys. She works in the property management business. Jeannine serves in several behind-the-scenes ministries at Oakwood and has a heart for those who are grieving.