Marriage Tears
By Kelley Kuphall
Love the Lord your
God: with all your heart! With all your soul! With all your mind! With all your
strength!
Deuteronomy
6:5 (NIV)
I
was crying in church...before the sermon even started. The husband on the video
said his wife was his best friend and she said that's how it started and that's
how it will end.[1] I had tears in my eyes, but I was able to hold them back
from falling. Just like I was holding everything back, even my heart to God's
working.
Then
my pastor[2] started to preach, and his openness made me feel like he was
talking to just us - - sitting in the 11th row. Everything from the series was
sinking in and the weight of my superego starting pouring out. I was crying for
my selfishness and sin. Crying for my friend’s marriage ending in divorce and
for our own marriage - - not entirely bad, but is it what God would call “good”?
How were we honoring God when we only aspire to glorify each other? My heart
was breaking for the things of God again. How can God take something so ugly
and make it beautiful?
I
heard a quote that’s stuck with me: “Love God the most and you will love each
other more.” I have this hanging up in our dining room, and yet, I forget about
the “loving God” part. Of course I love God. But more than my husband? More
than myself? The series at church has been driving home the truth that problems
in a marriage are not just between the husband and wife, but between each
individual’s relationship with God.
We
sang “Take it all, Take it all, my life in your hands” and “All to Jesus I
surrender” in the closing song. As I sang, I asked myself: Do I really want
Jesus to take it all? Can I really say I surrender it all to Him? And that's
when I had to ask for my husband's hanky. It was that uncontrollable,
shoulder-shaking, nose-sniffling cry that was probably very evident to the rows
behind us, but it felt so good to release my inner struggles and give it to the
One who not only created me, but created my life and family. He knows the hurt
and heartache, the old wounds and doubts. Why not let Him heal it? I checked
the box on our communication card that we would like to speak to someone about
our marriage. Let's be honest and vulnerable in our Christian walk, so others
can see Christ both working in and changing our lives.
GOING
DEEPER:
1.
Are you willing to surrender your marriage to the Lord so that He can take it
all and use it for His glory?
FURTHER
READING:
[1]
Watch Ted and Judy’s story by clicking HERE.
[2]
Roger Ellis, April 26, 2015: “Hitched: to Struggle.” Watch the sermon by
clicking HERE.
Kelley’s a wife and
mom who works part-time at a Christian counseling clinic and has a personal
direct sales business. Kelley serves with Oakwood’s worship team and is the
coordinator for the HeartLove Place Birthday Cake ministry.
